Friday, October 5, 2012

The Social Experiment


So, I have embarked on this journey I’m calling “The Social Experiment” and my aim is to try and find the best ways to meet a potential Mr. Right.

Me and other girl friends are going to be experimenting with a few single events nights as well as trying ‘speed dating’. I have however signed up and I have joined an elite introductions dating service. I have essentially hired a dating coach who is going to set me up on blind dates. A very expensive dating coach. Yes people, this is not a cheap experiment at all.

On the plus side this dating service promises to screen all my potential dates. I hope this includes criminal background checks, sexual offender background checks and genetic tests to test for balding. I have a genuine phobia of bald people. It’s real. Google it.

Fears include my church friends saying “we warned you against the evils of dating” and wasting this money only to meet guys who think way too much of themselves.


I went for an interview with the owner of the dating service on Monday. She is a very nice, knowledgeable lady who has 15 years experience (which includes her own three marriages…) and boasts about a success rate of 1 in 3 meeting their “soulmate”  She posed some really difficult questions while her black cat (I kid you not) was clawing its nails into my legs whilst I was sipping my tea. Yet, all I heard was that she immediately could picture a few potential suitors. She even read me some of their profiles and I agreed, they were prime Christian girl dating material.

Nearly two hours later I walked out of there feeling confident. Maybe this really is an opportunity to meet Mr. Right.

My ‘Platinum’ package includes:

  • A minimum of 10 introductions
  • A 27 dating tips report… which turns out to actually be only 26 as number 27 is some shameless marketing to the owner’s own blog.
  • Function credits… This is where the owner organizes fun evenings such as theatre nights, art exhibitions, sit-down dinners etc. for all her clients.
  • “Do it right” Saturday sessions focused on getting you prepared for a date. Topics include confidence, the right attitude, knowing what you are looking for, body language, presentation and communication.
  • All this is happening over the next 24 months… by that time I will be 27.
I am really stoked to know that this particular service only works with Christian clients. This takes the pressure off to evange-date for the next two years. Ha!

Yes, I think I really need a dating coach. It has been 6 years and my current situation of studying theology is not helping. Whenever I meet someone new the conversation inevitably reaches this part:
Person X:      So, what do you do for a living?

Me:                  I’m studying theology full-time and working part-time as…

I usually don’t even finish that sentence because the smiles have disappeared and they start running. Yes, studying theology is a major turn-off in the world. The polite ones will sometimes ask what denomination I belong to or the ever popular “how did you come to study theology?”

The situation baffles me. Aren’t all Christians suppose to be able to talk openly about their faith in Jesus Christ? I’m just going to do it for a living. It’s my passion. I am not holier than thou. I won’t put a Bible in-between me and them while on dates and I definitely won’t be quoting scriptures in response to every day questions.

If you are studying theology I bet you are nodding solemnly right now because you know this happens way too often.

So, after the payment was made on Tuesday morning, the owner immediately sent my profile to, let’s call him Number 1 and guess what? He called me on Tuesday. After the first very awkward 25 seconds we had a very decent 34 minute conversation. On Wednesday it was followed by another 30 minute conversation. Our date is this Saturday.

Here is some basics I know about Number 1:

He is 28 years old. +1
            I’m 25 now.
He works for a prominent company as a chartered accountant. +2
            No problem calculating the 10% to tithe then, hey?
He loves mountain biking and trail running. +2
Although my biking experience is limited to the gym, I also love the outdoors. Hiking, kloofing, camping. Bring it on!
He is a Christian. +3
           
Amateur detective work comes with the territory. I immediately got onto Facebook to stalk… I mean search his profile and I found it!! Only to find it without a profile picture. Boo. He does have 91 friends though… which I think explains his need for a dating service…

And then, late last night, came the question: “Do you have Skype?” I didn’t, but I downloaded it all while using my webcam on Windows Movie Maker to powder away those pesky shiny spots, I abused my black eyeliner and even sprayed on perfume in the crazy dash… as if he could smell me.

And then came the call. A call I can only describe as one of the most awkward calls of my life. Number 1 is not at all what I had pictured. He was fidgeting the whole time, he is skinny as a rake and he is…balding!!! Now, before you judge me for being vain, I am just being honest here. I am not all about looks. My ex-boyfriends can hardly be called oil-paintings!
The date is still on for this Saturday at 14:00. I’ll be honest, I’m nervous as hell. Me and my sister are hitting the malls today for a new outfit and some earrings. I’m also very excited and may even have the odd butterfly flying around. I guess this is normal. Built up expectation after only a few conversations. Is this what people who converse over emails on online dating sites feel?

Will I meet Mr. Right during this social experiment? I don’t know. I see it as an opportunity to at least expand my circle of friends. If I don’t meet my “soulmate” I will have had an opportunity of growth and learning. This experience will add value to my own life but also I will be able to share this experience with other single ladies and when you create value for others, you become more valuable to them. Who knows, maybe I’ll turn this blog into a support group for theology students who want to date.

It has begun, ladies! Tomorrow is D-Day. Dating Day! Hashtag #Boom!

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